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THE OPRAH WINFREY SHOW
Magazine / Source: Transcript, November 2003 |
Transcipt of the November 8, 2002 show featuring Nicole Kidman, Meryl Streep and
Julianne Moore
Oprah: Hi everybody. It is a really special show today because I’m on location in my favourite place to be when I’m not at home – it’s the spectacular romantic and tranquil hotel Bel-Air…this is the suite that I normally stay in, it’s all nestled in canyons of Los Angeles. And I’m really thrilled to be joined by three of the most extraordinary, talented women in Hollywood today. They are absolutely the best in the business and we are honoured to get this exclusive interview, because this is the only time these three superstars, really, will be appearing together. They are starring in a new movie that is so amazing that I begged them to please come and talk to me about it. It’s called The Hours, and it already has all kinds of, I think, well-deserved Oscar buzz. Take a look...
(Clip from The Hours as Oprah voices over: ‘Nicole Kidman plays to perfection the celebrated 1920’s author Virginia wolf, who is battling insanity’ among other nice things about Julianne Moore and Meryl Streep and about the movie.)
O: Please welcome Nicole Kidman, Meryl Streep, and Julianne Moore to our tea party at the Bel-Air. I really…I saw that movie and I was in tears for a number of reasons at the end. I didn’t know who to talk to so I called Kevin Euvane… Cause you call...Kevin Euvane (sp?) and I got Nicole’s number and said I’ve never seen a movie quite like this.
Nicole: It was a great call to get.
Meryl: I didn’t get that call
Julianne: I didn’t get it
(Laughter)
O: I couldn’t call everybody! I couldn’t call everybody…
N: I was the most available… was I… I was like sitting in bed!
M: Sitting by the phone…
O: I was taken by it, you know why? Because I’ve never seen a film, I can’t remember seeing a film where you have three roles for women where every performance is more extraordinary than the next. And I said to Nicole at the end, “This is why you act.” Did you feel that when you read the script?
N: I don’t usually, um, read other things when I’m working, but I was preparing to do The Others, and Kevin Euvane, um, (laughs)
O: Let’s see how many times we can mention his name in a… ok
N: …sent me this script and said, “You’ve gotta read this,” and I was like “Ohhh, alright,” and I started reading it one night, and I just read the whole thing. And I called him the next day, and I said ‘(gasp) Oh wow, I have to do it.’
O: We have to say who Kevin Euvane is, because if you’re watching in Iowa, you might go, “Who are they talking about?” He is the agent to the stars and happens to be the agent to all three of these spectacular women. So you got it from Kevin.
N: Yeah and I just said, “Um ok, well, what part?” And he said, “Well, Virginia Woolf.” And I said, “Oh well, no no, I don’t know if I’ll be able to do that.” And he said, “Well Meryl’s interested, Julianne’s interested,” and I was like “(sounds much more interested) Oh, oh well, (laughs) Great.” And then it all just came together, and then I spoke to Stephen Daldry, the director, and he sort of convinced me.
O: When I called you that day, because I just I had to talk to somebody and you were available. I’m so glad
N: I was sitting at home in bed
O: And I was talking about Meryl's breakdown scene and how it’s the most perfect breakdown scene. And you were saying how Meryl is the reason you’re an actress.
N: Mmhmm.
M: Oh wow. Well, millions thank you.
N: That’s embarrassing, but absolutely… (Nic grabs Meryl’s hand and squeezes it) …because for me it was like, here’s a woman who has integrity, who has never compromised in what she believes in and has done and is the greatest… I mean that’s it.
J: That’s the golden standard I think, for everybody
N: She is, and you sort of think, “Would Meryl do this, or would Meryl not do this.” You know and I mean literally …(squeezes Meryl’s knee) And you know it’s probably embarrassing sitting here…
O: You need a bracelet that says “What Would Meryl Do?”
N: But it’s true, and it’s so good to have a role model
J: You were on the cover of time magazine in 1980
M: When you were seven
J: No, I wasn’t - stop it. No… but you were on the cover of Time Magazine, and I remember it really made such an impression on me. I was like, “Look at this.” I said, “Look at this woman,” and you were doing such extraordinary work. And everybody knew it and it was so exciting
O: I remember that cover too; I had it in my office
N: She’s blushing (laughs)
O: I had it in my office until it started to yellow. It’s like, Meryl Streep, the one that said, “Star for the 80’s”
M: And then we met, I remember
O: Then we met
M: We met and I had this screaming baby with me who …and I was harassed and milk was coming (gestures to her chest)…(all laugh) and you thought, “That’s THAT woman?”
O: The star of the 80’s! And so…you know, everyone’s talking about “THE NOSE.”… “The nose.”
All: Yeah
N: I hate talking about “the nose, though.
O: I bet you do…
N: Because…
O: It’s not about the nose
N: Yeah, I get like a little, well, I wear this nose in the film, because, um, to change - not to look like Virginia, but to find her, to find the essence of her, and for some reason that came thru a nose and …
O: Some other things
N: …cigarettes, I have to say. I’m not doing a (makes a motion like rolling a joint)…I would roll my own cigarettes because Virginia would. And so my hand, I would get my hands going (making motion again)
O: At the beginning I thought ‘Is she smoking a joint?’
N: (laughing) No, I was about to say “and through the drugs!” No, no, I’m joking, it was not through that. But through rolling your own cigarettes, somehow gave me her hand, and then the nose gave me something else, and Ross gave me these incredible dresses that just hung and a hankie - do you say hankie in America?
All: Yes
N: (laughs) Which was very helpful, so it’s funny the little things that trigger you
J: Well what you see, too, when you look at Nicole, you see a face, you know, she’s transformed her face, emotionally.
O: Well, so much so I didn’t believe it was her. I was sitting next to someone saying, “Well, that’s Nicole” and I go, “Oh, it is not. It is not”
N: I love that (laughing)
O: It is not…and really like halfway through the movie I’m going, ‘Well it could be…it could be…maybe…’
N: Really?
O: Honest to goodness! I told you that.
J: But it’s Virginia Woolf. That’s what’s beautiful about it
O: Yeah, because it was Virginia Woolf to me. Do you have favourite scenes in this movie? One of my favourite scenes is with you [Meryl] on the bed with your daughter when you’re talking about happiness
N: Mmm (puts her hand on her heart)
J: Ohh yeah
M: The wonderful Claire Danes
O: Claire Danes
M: Who’s just (sighs)…I looked over at her and thought, “You know, I could get her really mixed up with one of the ones that I brow-beat regularly at home.” You know, she really seemed like my, one of my girls. Um, yeah, I love that scene.
(Shows that scene from The Hours)
M: Well I just love the way that the movie is sort of poised with equal parts on, you know, on despair and the desire to live
O: That’s exactly so well put. Despair, and the desire…you’re so eloquent. You are quotable…you’re a quote a moment.
M: Well then why doesn’t anybody listen to me at my house?!
(Laughter)
N: We’ll tell them.
M: I have to go on TV to get any attention.
N: Listen to your mum! She knows what she’s talking about.
O: Listen to your mom! She’s a quote a minute!
(Laughter)
(Commercial)
(Bumper back to show: guy holding platter of hors d’ouerves comes around and offers them to all four women)
O: No cause it’s got a…but afterwards I’ll have one
N: No, thank you anyway
M: No thank you
J: No thanks
O: You know that caviar will be right on your teeth! There’ll be little black things…
(Laughter)
(End of bumper)
O: We’re back with Julianne Moore, with Meryl Streep, with Nicole Kidman, at our tea party and the Bel-Air. You know, we were talking before we started the show, we’re at a tea party, but we’re not drinking the tea, because Meryl said it makes you sweat
(Laughter)
N: It’s very hot here today.
O: It’s hot here today! And as soon as I poured the tea, Meryl goes, “Tea makes you sweat.” (Laughter) Okay, forget it! …And between the three of you, you have eight children. you [Julianne] just had a little baby
J: Yeah, he’s 5 months old.
O: Everyone says it changes you forever, that you’re never the same person, your perspective on the world…
J: I think it’s…I mean it’s certainly the most profound experience I’ve ever had. It’s, you know, it’s wonderful, it’s been just tremendous.
O: Yeah, and I say this all the time on my show, I do think that mothers are the true spiritual teachers, and that there is no – not a more difficult job on earth, and that women, unfortunately in this country, are not valued for it. So I am amazed when I see the work that you all do outside of your home and then realize that you go home and you are moms, making spaghetti, and eating chocolate…
N: And pancakes
O: …and pancakes with your kids. I am amazed at that. Are you, too? Because you’ve raised…
M: I’m so tired.
(Laughter and some comments, but I can’t understand because they’re laughing)
M: ...Propped up…
J: A shell of her former self.
O: Does that amaze you, too, I mean of all the things that you’ve done, the fact that you’ve raised four children who now are…
M: Well they’re, heh, I wouldn’t say they’re raised.
O: Wouldn’t say they’re raised
M: No, I mean, there are some that are…and some that are not.
N: (laughs)
O: That are still not raised
M: But what’s really interesting is that you know, it gets more, uh…
J: That’s what they say.
M: …thick as time goes on. You’d think…
O: Cause how old is… Caleb is how old?
J: He’s four and a half
M: “You must be at the child when they’re at this month, the first year, and the first three years are so crucial”…let me tell you, between fifteen and eighteen…
N: Oh no!
M: …if you’re not really on it you’ve um, ab...
J: Abdicated?
M: Yes, your responsibilities, because they need you more than ever!
O: Right.
J: Yeah
O: That’s what my friend Gail said, she wanted to be there, you know, reduce her work hours once her kids were teenagers. And I’ve said, ‘well you know once they’re teenagers, they’re on their own,’ but - not so.
M: It’s just uh, attentive, and uh…look at me, giving advice like I know what I’m talking about.
N: No, I’m listening.
O: Your children are what ages now, Meryl?
M: 11, 16, 19, and 22.
N: Wow.
O: Not everybody’s raised.
M: No no no.
O: But do you consider 22 raised, “I’ve done it.”
M: I do, but is he out of the house? (Laughter) Well he is, as of last weekend. We were really wondering…
N: I’m still on the phone to my mother every day.
O: And your children are usually with you on the set? You have your children with you.
N: Some, like on Moulin rouge, they were there all the time, because they wanted to be there. They, um, get very bored very quickly on a film set.
O: So Virginia Woolf wasn’t turning ‘em on
N: Oh they can’t, they don’t like ‘the nose.’ My son’s like ‘uh uh.’ And we actually, I took them to see a movie the other night and they had a poster of our film, and Connor walks up and goes (makes stomping noise), “I DON’T like that nose!” and walked away.
(Laughter)
M: They don’t like you to do anything, really.
J: They don’t, no, they prefer that you be home. But my little boy saw the same poster, he was with his dad and he said (mimics his voice) ‘You know, I don’t like dat movie, because dat one, dere’s another little boy in dat movie.’ (Laughter)
N: Yes, jealous, they do, they get jealous of the other children playing your children.
J: He really didn’t like that AT ALL
M: Four?
O: He didn’t like you having another little son
N: No
J: No way. And he told his grandmother, “I feel when I see it that my mommy’s not my mommy.’
O: Really?
J: And I was so upset
M: They don’t like you…
N: ...changing…
J: To be different! You just need to be their mom.
All: Yeah
J: The same way, when you come home, they don’t necessarily want to talk to you, but they want to know that you’re standing there, ready to talk, if they, you know…
N: Yeah, how was your…
J: “MOMMM! MOM!” and you go, “Hi, hi!” and they’re like, “Ok, bye.”
N: Yeah
J: Yeah
N: And then, you know, “So, tell me about school today." (Shrugs) “It was alright.” That’s all I’m getting at the moment. “Well what’d you, tell me what you learned.” “Nothing.”
J: Nothing
N: My seven year old is still “Aaah!” My nine year old is - I don’t get any information.
O: Ok, you’ve reached that stage where you get no information. What has been, what is, what, what have you learned the most about yourself by being a mother, what have you learned the most about yourself?
N: Patience
J: Yeah
O: Patience
M: Humility
O: Humility
N: That you really don’t have the answers. Umm…
M: Gratitude to your own mother
J and N: Yeah, yes
M: Over and over and over
O: That’s probably when you get it the most.
N: Yeah
J: You really do appreciate it, finally, that’s when you say, “I understand what you did.” You know, and you appreciate it. It’s a great, a great gift actually; having children gives you back your parents. You know, you kind of go, “Oh...Oh! You felt this way about me?” You know, it’s astonishing, it’s really …it’s a great, great gift.
N: Um, but as a mother, your whole thing is, is to protect them (makes gaspy intake of breath sound), not want them to experience pain, not want them to go through things; but those, that adversity, a lot of times is the thing which gives you, um, your character or your backbone. So that for me, is the struggle, cause I’m like, (gasp) and then I have to go,”Ooohhh” (relaxed sigh)
O: And so, speaking of adversity, we all know that you went through a little.
N: (laughs)
O: A little adversity, and weren’t you shooting “The Hours” at the time that you were going thru…
N: I shot The Hours directly after, um, um, my marriage sort of fell apart. I think characters come into your life sometimes because they’re meant to, which sounds, you know, very new-age, but you know, I do feel that, you know, Virginia gave me a gift, because I got to play her at a time where I was in a struggle. I was in an emotional struggle and very depressed. And so then to be able to um, somehow use her and her knowledge and her things, and somehow it all came together.
O: Were you glad to be working at that time, were you glad that you had that?
N: I didn’t want to do it.
O: You didn’t want to do it
N: I, I’m actually, they laugh at me, my agents, because I always call up and quit the movie a week before.
M: Oh me too
N: Do you? Oh good! (Laughs) And um, have to be talked into it
O: Are you serious? Really?
M: That’s really funny
N: I’m terrible. It’s our running joke; they don’t even take it seriously. So cause I said ‘I can’t do this.’
O: Was it Kevin you called?
N: yeah
O: Euvane
N: Kevin is like a brother, really, and gets the whole…and uh said, “No no no, you get on that plane and you’re making that movie.”
O: So you called and said you’re gonna… because what, because you’re going through so much…
N: I just can’t do it, yeah, I just don’t want to work, I’m so upset, and I’m not going to be able to do this, and dahdahdahdahdah, just get me out of it! Get me out of it. But I’ve had that experience before. But this was …yeah
O: A week before?
N: Uh, yeah, about a week - maybe two weeks, but he just said, “No no no; you get on the plane, and you get over there and you do it.”
O: Wow. And Meryl, you do the same thing?
M: I do it all the time.
M: I do it all the time, yeah. But with me it’s like … (laughs)
N: Why do we do it? It’s weird
M: well I know why I do it
N: why do you do it?
M: because I think, I don’t know how to act,
N: Yeah!
J: (laughs)
M: why does anyone want to look at me onscreen anymore, you know, I do all those things that we, you know…self …
O: That’s a jaw-dropper, that is a jaw-dropper, that Meryl, star of the 80’s, on the cover of Time
M: Lots of actors are this way, you know, what, what gives you your strength is also your weakness. So your sort of raging insecurity makes to (?) and tap into those feelings…
O: Meryl, what Julianne was saying about you being the gold standard…you must, somewhere inside of yourself, know that you are.
M: Well, does that help? Does that help that everybody thinks that?
N: No cause you’re going “oh my gosh I’ve gotta go in there and face that”
O: No but somewhere inside don’t you think that, I mean when you see yourself in all of these roles that you’ve given to us
M: when it’s over I’m very happy, and I think, “Well, that was good!” But on the way in…no.
N: Dreadful, yeah
M: (pretending to be on the phone with her agent) “Just tell them I don’t want to do it. I’m sorry – tell them I’m sorry” (slams down imaginary phone) (laughter) …or go…get something to eat.
O: Did you say go get something to eat?
N: yes (laughs)
O: that’s funny cause I heard this – you [Julianne] don’t call up and quit, right?
J: No I don’t call up and quit
O: But I heard from Kevin Euvane that you DO reach a point after every film where you think you’re not gonna work again.
J: well, no also in the middle of it I feel, well at the beginning I’m scared, in the middle I think “mm, maybe I’m”…that’s when I start to like, doubt my choices, and then by the end I think I’ve ruined it. I’ve ruined it. That’s, y’know…and sometimes I will suggest other actors. If I read a script
N: I do that! – I suggested YOU
M: I do that. I do that
J: I say “ you know what, this is not good…” (Laughs)
M: this is great for…
N: I did, for The Others! I go, they, I was signed onto the contract, and you were shooting Hannibal. I was like, “I’m telling you, Julianne Moore would be so much better in this.”
J: (Laughs)
N: “What is she doing, Kevin?” and he said, “She’s working!”
J: “she’s in Italy!”
N: “Well, maybe then can push the film for her, cause I’m really not, I’m not right for this, and I’m telling you
J: “I’m not doing it”
N: “she’d be wonderful in this role. You must get on the phone and tell her it’s a great role, there’s nothing wrong with it, I’m just walking away from it, because I’m not in the position to make it. I don’t think I’ll be any good in it!”
O: That is amazing to me.
(Commercial)
(Clip from The Hours)
O: We’re back with Julianne Moore, with Meryl Streep, with Nicole Kidman. They are starring in a new movie; it’s called The Hours. Do you do anything to keep yourself looking this good?
J: there’s a team of professionals right out there (gestures beyond cameras) they’re all standing right there
N: (laughs)
O: What it took just to get us all in these chairs today…
N: this morning I didn’t look like this.
O: the nose, the nose…but do you have a health regime? I heard you [Julianne] wake up and drink a bottle of water? I read an article that Ellen Barkin did on you, and she said you were like, first thing you always do,
J: she was making fun of me
O: you get up you drink a bottle of water and then slice an apple, and I went, (makes an astonished face)
J: no I, I cut up fruit for my son
O: Oh okay, I’m thinking, that’s just too damn healthy for me
J: she was making fun of me cause she’s my best friend, so she was spending the entire time making fun of me.
O: Oh
J: I have a little obsessive-compulsive disorder, too, so she was making fun of my routine in the morning
O: yeah, don’t you have a lucky way to go to work?
J: yes, yes exactly. I like to go with the lights…
M: do you?
J: oh it’s terrible. Yeah I’m gonna be straightening fringe out in a minute on the rug. (Laughter)
N: washing your hands…
J: Uh huh! (Laughs)
O: do you work out?
M: No
O: you don’t work out? Oh you don’t.
M: Oh, Oprah. (Laughter) This is such a…we don’t have another hour
O: No we don’t! But I’m just saying, I envy that! I envy that you look like this
M: envy what?
N: Look at her skin…
O: you can look like this
N: beautiful skin. Oh no sun?
O: and you don’t have to struggle with work--
M: I struggle; everyday I say, “Should I eat that? No no no” I love what Julia Roberts said, she said ‘you know, it’s this thing, where you just every day, being an actress is about: No.’ it’s about saying no, always to things that make you happy (Laughter). And I think we’re not as active as we used to be, and I always take the stairs if there’s, you know, the elevator, that’s the choice. You always, you know, you think about things and…
O: I think we’re more active. I go to the gym, and I’m thinking, ‘who are all these people here?’ I think it’s amazing
M: well you do, but most, most people don’t do anything
O: they’re not out
N: what is this, an hour a day, you have to do now. Did you read that?
J: yeah, I read that.
N: Is that like, sweat like an hour a day? Or is it…
O: Yes
N: right
M: yes, you just have a cup of tea.
J: and you can just sweat like that!
O: but you [Nicole] wouldn’t know about that.
N: No, I swim. I’m a swimmer
O: you swim
M: I’m sweating now.
N: I mean, like (makes motion as though lifting weights)
O: have a cup of tea, and you don’t have to worry about it
M: I’m working out right now
O: so there’s no beauty regime, no
N: I swim, I like to swim
O: you do swim.
N: Mmhmm.
O: and I hear you never go out without a hat cause you, that’s why…
N: no, uh uh, the sun, I mean that would be my main, my main thing, which I actually feel quite strongly about (Laughs)
J: yeah, me too, actually, I do that too
N: it’s um, because, we’ve had, you know, skin cancer and stuff in our family. And I come from a country, Australia, which has a really high incidence of skin cancer, and you know, people take in too much sun. They do!
O: I’m with you on that. At the end of my magazine, every month, I do a thing called “what do I know for sure,” and I just want to end…I came up with that, it’s not some brilliant thing on my part, but Gene Siskel used to ask that. I remember, I don’t know if he ever asked that of you [Meryl]. What do you know for sure, and the first time he asked me, I had to go, I couldn’t think of anything, I went home and two days later called him up. But he goes, ‘The camera’s off now.’ But what do you know for sure?
N: (makes little laughy noise like “hoh”)
M: You should get two days
N: ummm…um, give and you’ll receive. That’s what I’ve, what I’ve sort of learned. And that the more you give, the more you’ll give back. Um, and uh, stay open and trust.
O: Stay open and trust.
N: Mm.
O: Yes, Julianne. She’s hoping, go to (ok this part I can’t figure out…something about either Meryl or someone named Carl and Nicole says “and wear sunscreen!")
J: yeah that’s right
O: yes
J: Uh…
N: Oh, Meryl’s thinking!
M: Meryl’s working.
N: Hold on, Meryl’s got time!
O: she’s quotable!
J: she’s gonna be the …yeah…I’d say that it’s uh, easier to be happy than it is to be sad.
O: Mmm.
N: (snorts)
J: you know, it takes less work, depression is…hard, so…
O: I will take that!
J: Okay…she’s gonna be better though, I know it
N: come on, Meryl
O: that’s right, now it’s a contest, yes, come on
M: what do I know for sure? I know I will never, ever lose the weight from the first baby.
(Laughter)
O: which was 22 years ago
M: fifteen pounds – and I hold it against him!
J: he was fifteen pounds?
N: (laughs)
J: no, YOU added fifteen
M: No I gained, I have the fifteen pounds
O: still, that you never got rid of.
M: And I don’t care.
N: (laughs and claps)
O: We’ll be right back.
(Commercial)
(Bumper back to show…people serving them iced tea)
J: (says something about her baby)
N: We still get tea, that’s nice
(End of bumper)
O: Can you tell that story about this morning and the kids?
N: Excuse me, I just burped
(Laughter)
M: (makes a face and waves her hands like it smells) garlic!
N: Stop! I did not have garlic. Um, what was I saying?
O: you were making, you were telling about the kids this morning, we were talking about the kids I think that’s great for America…
N: Oh ye,s well I was just telling Oprah, I’m doing the whole ‘this is not a restaurant’ this morning.
J: Oh yeah
N: Right? “Excuse me”
O: she said she could hear her own mother’s voice in her head
N: I’m like making oatmeal pancakes and turkey bacon, and then I get asked for bacon. ‘No, I’m not eating any of this, all I want is real bacon.’ Well, turkey bacon’s still real bacon, isn’t it?
M: yeah
O: so you’re going ‘No, this is not a restaurant’
M: try it, get your own breakfast
N: this is not a restaurant, this is the selection, and that’s it. And then it was, “Well, I’m not eating.’
O: and so did he?
N: what do you do?
O: what do you do? You let him not eat and wait til the next meal
N: no
O: I guess
N: No, then they go to school and eat, like, junk
M: yeah
J: Mhmm
O: oh, okay
N: (big sigh)
O: Don't ask me, I don’t have kids, I have dogs. Let’s talk about, I want to talk about whether or not the idea of getting older…what does that mean to you, if anything?
M: why are you looking at me?
(Laughter)
O: We want to talk about THAT, and what it means, if anything to you, Meryl
(Laughter)
M: Oh God…I just feel so lucky to be alive, you know? In our business, it’s cruel, the attention to how you look is cruel and unrealistic I think
O: don’t you think – I mean, I certainly do, so I’m not try to impose my thoughts on you, but don’t you think it’s bigger than just roles for women over 40? I think it’s bigger than that, I think it’s just how we, as women, view ourselves, and what other women expect of other women. It’s um, it’s about value and not just about roles, as far as I’m concerned
M: yeah
O: yeah
M: we devalue ourselves
O: right
M: and we have to stop that. We really do.
O: what’s going to stop it though? We devalue ourselves by saying, ‘Oh well she’s too old for that’ or ‘She shouldn’t be wearing that’ and ‘Can you believe she’s doing that at that age?’ and ‘She’s with him and he’s ten years younger’
J: nine, nine.
O: nine, ok
(Laughter)
N: Go, girl!
O: all those things that we say about each other and to ourselves, you know, right?
J: right
O: yeah, we have to stop that. You turned 40?
J: Mhmm
O: was that, what was that for you – traumatic? Exciting? Wonderful?
J: it was fine, you know, it was fine. I kind of, I think I’m with Meryl. Consider the alternative. I’m, I’m, I’m so happy with my life and my relationship and my family and you know, my job, I have a great job, you know, most of the time. I feel fortunate. So I do think, you know, Jack Nicholson – did you read that article in the New York Times?
When he said somebody asked him how he felt about getting older, and he said, ‘You know, this stuff, and they do it to women all the time, it’s self-fulfilling prophecy. If you’re talking about it, it’s gonna get worse.’ It was kind of interesting
M: he also said, that in terms of being attracted to 25-36 year olds, or something
J: oh I know! That was…that was weird
M: “well it’s just this sweet spot I have. And it’s biological” and blah
(Laughter)
M: you think he’s still lovable, old wreck that he is
(Laughter)
M: I still think I am! You know…
N: Some… I also think your point - it’s about um, and this starts to sound, you know, very so- but about other women supporting other women
O: Mmhm
N: Cause I do think, umm, you know, yeah we can say ‘Oh well’ this and that, but if you um, support each other, as women, then that’s very very strong, and that really um, helps, you know? And a lot of the time, women are very tough on other women
O: Oh for sure
N: so that’s where you can go, “You know something, I’m not gonna be like that”
O: that standard
N: and that …sisterhood. Like I have a girlfriend who’s just taken off, in terms of her career. Um, and she’s 34 years old, and it’s huge for her now. She was in David Lynch’s film Mullholand Drive and she’s got this career now. And everyone’s saying to me, “Oh well, how are you two gonna stay friends?” and you’re like, “HOW??”
J: yeah, yeah, that’s…I know
N: what are you TALKING about? This is the girl that I grew up with, since I was 14, 15. This is now where I get to, and you know, we just all went out on Saturday night, actually, cause it was her birthday and a big thing and this is about where you go, “Wow!” and feel…and be generous
O: “I’m happy for you”
N: cause if you’re generous of spirit, it comes back to you. You get…and I think women don’t learn that early enough. You know, and if you can teach that to your daughters, um, to really stick by each other it really um, I think it helps, because boy, your female friends, when you hit the big crisises in your life, are the ones that are there for you.
J: Mmhmm
N: and that’s so important to have them
O: I saw this t-shirt once that said ‘husbands come and go, but best friends are forever’
N: right there
O: yeah, right there. But age, that’s not something you think about at this age, right, getting older and what it will mean for you,
N: Um well when they asked me to play Virginia Woolf, it was like “Ooh, I wouldn’t play older.” You know, some people were saying to me, “Ooh, don’t play older,” and you’re like, “Why not? Well now I want to do that now, because you said that” you know? Because then what you say is, as an actress, you know, you can play all different ages for quite a long period of time. And I think that’s why a lot of women don’t want to reveal their age, as an actress.
O: Mmhmm
N: because suddenly you get boxed into...
O: correct
N: What you are when…
M: I think you should say your age.
N: I say my age.
J: yeah
M: I think you should say your age, always
N: yes, because that’s part of going, “Here we are”
J: yeah
M: because that’s part of respecting yourself
O: I do too
M: and if you hide your age…
O: please say that gain
N: yeah, yes
O: I lose respect for women who either don’t say it or who lie about it. Because I think that to deny that is like to deny a part of yourself. Is to disrespect a part of yourself
N: Except I know men who say it about themselves as well, who won’t reveal their age
O: yeah
N: “I’m a little over sixty” (laughs)
J: “I’m a little over sixty,” that’s a good one!
N: Hold on, you’re eighty!
(Commercials)
(Clip from The Hours)
O: We’re back with Julianne Moore, with Meryl Streep, with Nicole Kidman. They are starring in a new movie that’s called The Hours, and it’s one of the best movies I’ve seen in ages. The movie makes you thoughtful about yourself; it makes you thoughtful about those moments. What would you say was your happiest moments?
J: the days my children were born…oh here I go again (fans face as if to keep from crying)
O: I was gonna say, other than your children, but okay, when your children were born
J: you know, talk about drama. You know, it was, yeah, that was so exciting. I’ve never had anything like that happen to me before. And it happened twice
O: yeah
J: it’s so exciting. It’s the best thing ever.
O: Somewhere, I was in Montecito, and I was just walking down the lane, and there was um, there was a hummingbird, and I could smell, like, the orange blossoms, and did you and just that moment where you think, ‘oh my…I am really happy.’ You know?
M: that’s wonderful
O: yeah and those…I started writing them down to remember when I was, but…didn’t you have an incident in somewhere in a store or restaurant or something recently? Tell us about that.
N: (laughs) Um, just a, actually a waitress in a restaurant that I’d gone into, and she came up, just quietly, actually, when she was bringing the check, and she just said to me, ‘it’s so good cause you, you look happy and I’ve seen you thru, you know, the last few years, and you haven’t looked happy.’
O: and you felt what when you heard that?
N: I felt, um ‘ah, well good, I’m glad you think that!’ no (laughter) I’m acting! No no I’m joking. No I thought…I actually thought I looked probably not so good and everything but it’s, I think it’s so much is in it, your essence, you know, those times when…
O: there’s an energy
N: and I do think that, even…I mean, there’s a beautiful line in the film, which is about, you know, why does somebody have to die? So that we can appreciate life more
O: Mmhmm
N: and it’s contrast. And you actually don’t want everything to always exist there (makes motion with hand straight across and level). You can’t, it’s never gonna happen
O: that’s right you wouldn’t appreciate happiness
N: so this (moves hand in up and down motion) is okay (laughs)
O: Mmhmm
N: and with that, so that’s why, yeah, smelling, you know, the orange blossom and seeing the hummingbird, because you’ve got the other. But I think it is also - happiness is so much about just taking the time sometimes, just to go ‘what do I actually feel?’ because you rush and you move and you…and so little is about settling and just going ‘how do I actually feel now?’
O: and, like Clarissa was saying, Meryl’s character, was, is understanding that when you have that moment, it’s the now
N: mm! It’s not the beginning
O: it’s not the beginning, it’s not promised beyond right now.
(Commercials)
(Bumper back to show)
guy off-camera: Oprah, when I do this, it’s wrap it up; that’s what that means
O: I kind of know that
N: (claps and laughs)
(end of bumper)
O: we do a little thing on the show that we call, I ask everybody their favorite things. So you don’t have to – it’s not a contest, you’re not going to win a thing
N: Aww
M: oh
N: We want to win something!
O: ok, favorite gift to give
N: Flowers
O: Favorite gift to get
J: Candy
O: ok, Favorite gift to give and to get, Meryl
M: Give! Um, trees.
O: trees?
M: yes
O: trees
M: I give people trees from the American forest thing; I think it’s a great thing. Um, favorite thing to get. Um, a day off.
O: there you go. A day off. Ok, favorite book. Favorite book
M and N: Ooh.
M: oh well, this last one. I mean, I loved "Atonement"
N: Just finished it!
M: and I loved Jonathan Franzen …did you? Loved it, loved it.
O: "Corrections," you loved "Corrections"
M: Ohh my God
O: Favorite book.
N: for me?
O: yes
N: um, well, the first that I read that really (exhales) “War and Peace.”
O: Really?
N: Yeah
O: You really read it?
N: I read it when I was like 13, really young, and I wanted to be Natasha
J: yeah
N: and have prince Andre
O: favorite book
J: Little Women
O: Little women
J: you know
O: when you read it first, who did you think you were?
J: I wanted to be Beth
O: You wanted to be Beth.
J: you know cause she was good and she died and it was sad and you know, yeah I used to read that passage over and over and over again.
M: everyone loved her so much
J: they loved – exactly and they were so sad when she was…yeah
O: I wanted to be Jo, I wanted to be Jo! Do you have a favorite cereal?
N: Favorite cereal? Oh yeah. (Laughs) I love cheerios – honey nut cheerios. (Laughs) I love cereal.
O: Sometimes it’s the best meal. Sometimes it doesn’t matter what else is there.
N: Yeah, at like midnight, honey nut cheerios are great.
O: It’s the best
M: you know, aren’t they all made with uh, genetically modified …
N: Probably
M: I mean most of the, the big brands
N: but I like cocoa puffs too
(Laughter)
O: Your favorite memory
N: oh…it’s…the favorite?
O: ok, favorite clothes, clothes?
N: Oh I know one favorite
J: Pulling my sister over the side of her crib. I used to pull her over the side of the crib to get her out
O: Pulling your sister over the side…ok look at Meryl. Come on
M: Mm. Boy. I have too many. Mmm
N: that’s a great thing to say, though, too many.
O: You?
N: I have some wonderful memories, frankly, but favorite…um, swimming in the surf with my sister in um, Sydney when I was little. And I just remember like, laughter from the beach, and that was my parents. And just noise and sun and surf. And making out (laughs)…in the car. I do remember like that, kissing in the car, oh yum. So yummy
M: I remember my first kiss
O: And?
M: it was with peter miller
J: peter miller (laughs)
M: and it was at church where, you know, you’re learning about whatever it is. Church group, and he pulled me behind the curtains and he took off my glasses, and he said, “There. Now you look great.”
N: (laughs)
M: and I wouldn’t wear my glasses after that, my mother went crazy. She’d drive to school with them…but he kissed me.
O: and he kissed you. That was your first kiss
M: Yeah, I think, yeah
O: peter miller is somewhere going, “God, she remembered!”
N: Where are you, peter miller?
O: do you remember your first kiss?
J: yeah, I, I, I, uh, I was, it, I was too young, well I, he opened his mouth and I got scared and I laughed. (Laughter)
N: Julianne!
O: Well then that wasn’t a kiss
J: Well then you know, it I kinda fell into his face, and then I laughed, and it wasn’t…you know.
M: but you know now kids learn to kiss from movies where everyone’s going (opens mouth wide) and we learned – I learned – from the movies
J: where they do this (makes chaste kissing face with lips together), mmhmm
N: (makes kissy face)
M: Where they were doing it to be photographed nicely
O: yeah, yeah, where your mouth isn’t open, and things are moving around in it. Yeah. Amazing
N: a great kiss, though, is pretty …pretty spectacular, no? (Laughs) now we’re…let’s move off this now. No, but kissing’s lovely! Kissing’s so...
O: I think it’s one of the great things in life – a great kiss can just curl your hair. Really. But the first kiss is usually …and what’s interesting about a first kiss – you can never really have that again.
N: mhmm
O: right, yeah.
(Commercial)
O: I can’t thank you enough. I want everybody to see The Hours. I just want everybody to see The Hours
M: Great
N: Thank you
M: Thank you
J: Thank you for having us
O: Thank you so much for coming to our tea party
N: Thanks for the tea. That we didn’t...
O: tea makes you sweat
(Laughter)
O: Thanks, that’s it. Oh, that’s not it! Hey, thanks for coming to our tea party, and I think we should bring Kevin Euvane out here (laughter)
N: (catcall noise)
O: So you can see, who is the Kevin that…Kevin! Kevin! Agent to the real stars, ladies and gentlemen, this is Kevin Euvane. How did we all do?
Kevin: You did well.
O: Ok we did well.
